Did your parents give you wise advice on your wedding day ?
Before we left for the church, my loving father told me to let my husband be the leader in our marriage, and he told me never to nag him. And, he told me to be a good cook.
Good advice from my Daddy !
The Bible gives dismal descriptions of what it is like living with a contentious, or nagging wife. Proverbs 27:15 says that she is like ‘the dripping of a leaky roof in a rainstorm.’
It says that it would be better to live on the corner of a rooftop, or in the desert, than with a nagging wife. Proverbs 21: 9, 19. Yikes !
Of course, we also know that living with a contentious, argumentative husband would be no better.
My husband and I were required to take a marriage preparation course before we wed , and the need for careful communication was greatly emphasized.
After breakfast, when we feel refreshed, we pray, and then we discuss our plans for the day. We ask the Lord’s help with the challenges we will face.
If I have a request for my husband, I know that I will only need to ask him ONCE, because he ‘hears’ me. Similarly, I ‘hear’ what he communicates to me.
Therefore, neither of us has any need to make repeated requests, or ‘nag’.
A spouse who does not respond to a reasonable request made by their partner in a timely manner is sometimes guilty of passive-aggressive behaviour, which falls into the same category as being chronically late.
There are times that I know my husband appreciates when I don’t try to communicate with him. These are when he’s hungry, or tired, or driving, or focused on another activity.
When we were working, we didn’t talk for the first hour we arrived home, since we were exhausted from dealing with people all day long.
Let us pray that God will bless our communication. May He give us the grace to clearly hear and respond to our partners. In doing this we convey our respect for our beloved. Careful and considerate communication is a vital component of a happy marriage.